WIN: Giraffes need to learn some fucking respect

One of the best parts of hitting a zoo early is that you can sometimes find yourself alone with animals. Most people do that dumbshit kissing noise, trying to get attention. I prefer to just tell the animal how it fucking is.

Giraffes need a good kick square in the teeth, and if I’d been able to jump the moat, I would’ve been the one to administer it.

Yelling curses at critters is insanely fun.

Below you see one of my fave internet pics, wonderously titled Giraffe Vs Plane

EPIC WIN: Lions have poor aim

So, coming at you live and large from San Diego. I took some time to sleep (and get really, really drunk) last night so I was and good to go at 7am today. I then headed out to the San Diego Zoo to meet some awesome animals and film some gear.

There’s more to come, but this right here? This is the best thing you will see today, I swear on all that is holy. I’m so proud of this my balls are glowing with pride.

WHAT. THE. FUCK.

WIN: Rollerboys looks like the shit

I thought I’d better bring you up to speed on something – each time I visit the US, I set myself the goal of trying to track down a super-obscure DVD. This time, I’m pretty sure I have a fair sized challenge laid out for me – I’m trying to find Corey Haim’s Rollerboys.

Fuck yeah.